So I went to a wedding yesterday. It was fun. One of my former students was marrying this guy I had never met until the wedding was over, so I didn’t even get a chance to disapprove.
I sat with several people I knew and tried to enjoy things. It was a very nice wedding. Looked like a huge expense for someone. But I knew it would be. Lauren had been looking to get married for a while, and we all knew she would be the first one of her high-school friends to make the plunge. When I invited her to eat Chinese with us back in January and she said, “I can’t. My wedding is only five months away,” I knew that she was planning for the end-all of weddings. It was, as I said, very nice.
The reception was also very nice. Lots to eat, but not the kind of food you’d make a meal out of. The right number of tables for everyone to sit fairly close, but not so close you had to talk to them. And just enough people to make everything last about 2 hours, long enough for the bride’s dad to feel he got his money’s worth, but not long enough for everyone to want to leave before the happy couple.
I left before the happy couple. It wasn’t the wedding; it was very nice. But I didn’t really know more than five or six people there, and I’d already talked to the bride twice. I had some grocery shopping to do. I don’t guess I’ve ever left a wedding before the couple until yesterday. I love the big send-off. I love throwing rice/birdseed/candy at them. It’s the best part. I could just show up for that and feel happier because of it. At my own send-off one of my friends threw a ton of rice *into* my car. I never could get all of it out. I am sure that whoever owns that old Pontiac now can still smell boiled rice every summer.
I wonder what people thought of my wedding. My wedding was wonderful. My bride looked beautiful and the preacher was well-versed. A good friend played a song that he wrote. We even had some fun at the end of the ceremony. It was the reception that we should have skipped. I didn’t even want to be there through most of it. I’ve thought lots about how I would have changed things for *my* sake, but I don’t guess I’ve ever thought of my poor guests. Those poor people. I should send them an apology card. Well, here’s hoping my boys will just elope.
On a side note…I just knew the groom was going to pass out at one point. He had his knees locked the whole time and at the beginning the preacher was making a big show of things by standing very close to the couple and talking on about their eyes or something. The groom wasn’t able to back out without looking uncomfortable, so he just stood there the whole time the preacher was talking trying his best not to shuffle around or move his feet. Which, of course, is the worst thing you can do when you’re nervous. Slows the flow of blood to the brain and such. I’m really glad he didn’t pass out because if he did I was thinking of yelling, “You just lost five dollars” (best Bender impersonation) just for the funny. All in my mind, though. I didn’t actually know any of the parents or older friends so I wasn’t in friendly company. But it would’ve been hilarious, wouldn’t it?
Party on, Lauren and Daniel. And good luck.